Girlfriend of 7 years cheated on me with some jackass vegan. My question is WHY?

whywouldshe · 3 days

Relationships go through ups and downs; and just like you described, there are difficult times where you aren't able to be there as much, or keep her as excited and interested. This is a reflection on her, that she wasn't able to endure through this period where you've been busy.

You are correct in wishing that if she wasn't feeling fulfilled that she should have said something...and while you're at it, you should also wish for a unicorn and world peace. Men and women ARE hugely different psychologically: that doesn't mean either is more predisposed towards cheating when the opportunity arises, just that they approach and deal with problems in different manners. It's also not as cut-and-dry that a person either will or won't cheat either - it's a continuum. It's obvious that your former fiance was on the 'will' end of that bell curve.

Your perspective on this is ridiculously limited, and what you need now is more exposure to how men and women actually operate. Now that you've been force fed the "Red pill", read Married Man Sex Life for context on how and why things work inside of a relationship, and check out Chateau Heartiste (formerly known as 'Roissy in DC') for a more pragmatic (and politically incorrect) approach to why women defy conventional wisdom.

Mrfriendguy · 5 days

Getting perspective, being rational, and keeping your cool are all very important things to do - because jealousy is difficult for everyone involved to deal with.

...that being said, your gut isn't a very subtle organ - and if it's telling you that something is wrong; there is a good chance something is wrong.

Don't accuse your girlfriend of anything - but TALK TO HER. Tell her that you're uncomfortable, and the two of you should be able to come to a mutually agreeable solution on how she can study effectively and ease your concerns.

houndsounds424 · 9 days

Thanks for the update, and good job keeping your cool. I would say that you handled it about as well as anyone could have hoped for.

smittyben · 19 days

More professional? I have the all-leather version of this: http://duluthpack.com/business/standard-book-bag.html, and it doesn't look out of place when in business formal.

Schpsych · 29 days

The Panasonic 15.6v line is getting long in the tooth, but there is a reason it has been unchanged for 10+ years - it's that good of a drill!

millertime0503 · 1 month

Autodesk 123D (http://www.123dapp.com/)

aetheralloy · 2 months

I KNOW! I'm probably falling victim to it right now. This very moment. Derp.

aetheralloy · 2 months

Nope; just throwing it out there for people to see that there has been research into how difficult it is for people to question their own beliefs.

aetheralloy · 2 months

Dunning-Kruger...

Escendo · 2 months

Swing a hammer. Working on a jobsite doing rough-framing all through college built my forearms to the point where I can't wear any watch right out of the box because the bands are inadequate.

DoubleLiveGonzo · 2 months

St. Louis County didn't take the full 30 days; not even a full two weeks if I remember correctly.

greggersraymer · 2 months

5.11 makes a decent shirt with armpit pockets; shouldn't be too hard to wear underneath something baggy.

sartirious · 2 months

Exactly. Make sure your IWB or whatever doesn't print and you'll be fine.

sartirious · 2 months

As private property, those places have every right to prohibit firearms on the premise. But, it's hard for them to enforce it - in most situations, all they can legally do is ask you to leave once they are aware you are carrying.

petron · 3 months

Turn that frown upside down!

andrea922 · 3 months

It's true. Also, I happen to know one lesbian in TCS.

BomanTheBear · 3 months

(iPhone)

Wolfram Alpha
Evernote
SplashID
Tapatalk
RadarScope
Speed Test
Camera+

PartyRock0 · 3 months

Check out Minnesota Kinky Youth, or "MinKY" for short. Fetlife would be the best way to get in contact with them.

mjbat7 · 3 months

Do this. Talk to her.

If your GF finds GW to be offensive - then for all intents and purposes, it is. If that is how she feels, but she never communicated that to you - her behavior is unreasonable. Wait until she cools off and comes down from her broomstick, and bring this stuff up.

It's fucking stupid to have invisible boundaries like this in a relationship. If either of you feel that certain behaviors will make it or break it, you need to get that shit out in the open before someone trips over it.

ThrowawayValentines · 3 months

Talk. To. Him.

You don't need to blow up about it, but you need to bring it up. Whether or not you are overreacting or being insecure is up to the two of you.

Have you two had a frank discussion about how you feel there is a difference between Redtube and r/gonewild? How would you want him to respond if he saw browser history of you checking in on your ex? If he is dishonest about these things, if he know you disproved and were trying to hide them - that would be a bad thing. But if he was simply assuming something because the two of you hadn't crossed this bridge before, you now have a chance to set some lines in the sand and be honest with each other.

...but it's not gonna work if you swoop in on your broomstick. Calm down, and then work it out.

ipear · 3 months

Upboats! for the Black Diamond storm

jobsearch2012 · 3 months

My resume was fairly polished beforehand; in fact, they called me because of having seen it on one of the job websites - I can't remember which one it was though. Give them a call, it can't hurt.

jobsearch2012 · 3 months

One of the best ways to break back in is through a recruiting agency. I used Aerotek, and it worked out really well. It wasn't a position I enjoyed (to be perfectly honest), but it did allow me more time to keep working towards finding the job I did want.

KillaKels · 4 months

There certainly is a chance that you and your father and stepmother can still have a healthy relationship - but it probably won't happen soon. If your father is in counseling, that is a good step. Counseling can take years though, and your father might need to first deal with the issues around his PTSD before he can even think about anything else.

Until then, make a list of everything you want out of this relationship. Then narrow it down to the essentials. I wouldn't recommend emailing this to them, but make it very clear to your father and stepmother that these things are what you want/expect from them; and if they fail to deliver, then they won't be a part of your life.

Actually, that's a good way to evaluate any relationship.

sartirious

TROPHY CASE

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