I hope you get to read this. I was debating even to bother at this point; however, I realized even if no one reads this I put it out there in the very least memorial of a friend.

I was 18 a Senior in high school. Being on EDT at the time 1st period was just as mundane as any other Tuesday. During the release between periods I heard some excited yelling hear and there, I generally payed no attention as there was always banter between friends during this time. I walked into my second period class (American History), the teacher had the TV on. It wasn't too unusual as that teacher was very laid back and had us watch history documentaries. As I passed the screen to get to my desk I glanced at it saying aloud, "Oh, wow that's a big fire..." My teacher interrupted me sharply, "SHHHH Be quiet!" As I settled into my desk I had become increasingly aware that the fire was in the WTC. I noticed as other kids shuffled in, that some of the 1st period kids were not leaving. Another kid in class leaned over and told me in a hushed tone that a plane had crashed into the tower. Just at this time a plane appeared in frame. In the milliseconds that passed from that instant, I knew that this was no accident. The sinking gut feeling settled just before the second plane impacted the tower.

That was the instant that the shock took over. My brain began a dizzying over analyzation of every frame that flashed in front of my eyes for the next 2 hours. The class sat in awe and near silence as we watched the next events unfold on live TV. I recall, some minutes later watching the fires burn from nearly every possible angel, "My God, those towers are going to collapse." I frightened the girl next to me, she asked, "What do you mean?" I explained that due to the intensity of the fire, that the heat would cause the iron and steel to become weak and the weight of the top portion of the tower would cause it to buckle. I remember this so vividly, because, I had been training with the local Fire & Rescue department for 3 years by this point. We had studied many case studies of fires and also discussed many principles of fire science. This realization set absolute fear in me. My brain had already worked out a logical conclusion to the event that I knew, no one else in the room had even started to contemplate. I realized that most of the firefighters shown on the screen going into the buildings would never come back to their families and stations.

As the South tower buckled and collapsed, I still couldn't believe it. Shortly after that the North tower fell. In the chaos being streamed live into our souls all the cameras on the ground had gone dark. The anchors were in shock and the TV remained silent for several seconds. As the news station began to switch back to the cameras on the ground at ground zero the dust was beginning to give way to the sunlight. The audio was muffled; but, this is when the terror set in for me. You could hear the alarms cutting through the silence. Piercing the dust, debris, and my heart.

As dust covere people were staggering out of their hiding places in the post apocalyptic scenario, another kid in my class yelled out, "Listen to all those car alarms." I knew better, in a shaky voice on the verge of crying I exclaimed, "Those aren't car alarms!" I advised them and everyone else in the class that they were PASS devices (Personal Alert Safety System). I explained that they only alarm if the firefighter wearing them is not moving. I could see the impact that statement had on the other students' and the teacher's faces.

The school had extended the period due to the news. The administration was trying to figure out if they were closing the school early, etc. I only have 4 classes and then went to OJT for the last 2 periods.

The fourth period alarm rang and we all quietly and somberly exited the class and moved to our next class. I remember it being eerily quiet except for the sound of those alarms. Passing each open class room with their TV on to the scenes of utter destruction and dismay was so surreal. It seemed that sound was haunting me, that all other sounds were drowned out in my mind.

Once, I got to my fourth period class, I found my friend upset trying to call his Dad. He had just started this year at school; because, he and his mom just moved down here from NYC. His Dad worked in the WTC. I tried to comfort him; but, he was soothed when he talked to his mother. His Dad had called her and said he was okay, he couldn't talk long because the phones were on and off. This event would lead to a tragedy yet to unfold years later.

I went to work that day; but, found the call center I was working closed. I was a telemarketer for a credit card company that will remain unnamed. We closed due to the majority of our calls being to NY. We actually had agents earlier in the day call into the WTC shortly after the first plane impacted. I never felt more terrible for having that job. I couldn't imagine being the agent that called into an office and someone picking up the phone expecting emergency services and here we are pitching them a credit card with a 4.9% intro rate!

We remained out of work for a week and a half. After that, we just couldn't make the numbers and our contract was pulled. I was laid off on October 31st.

In those mere weeks we witnessed a dramatic shift in discussions and ideas. There wasn't anywhere you could go without seeing an American flag. The unity was great the public out poring of donations to fire fighters and police was intense. I remember early jumping on board with the idea to go to war. Until, it was declared a war on terror. Once the fear subsided and rational thought returned to me I knew there was no way to win a war on terror.

After highschool my friend and I hung out from time to time (He was better friends with my best friend, they hung out all the time) In 2003 he moved back to NY, he hated it here and he wanted to be closer to his father. About a year later unable to cope with the depression since 9/11 my friend's Dad committed suicide. Unable to cope with the depression since his father committed suicide, my friend also took his own life. By this time I had lost contact with him for some time. I didn't even find out until February this year.