You weren't there then and are relying on the Guardian. Yet you are going to tell me what I saw and insult me in the process? Wow.

Before I start though, a brief word on the nephew situation. He was going to the demo anyway, regardless of what adults said. If I didn’t go with him he was going with his friends, which I judged to be too risky. Better to have me with him and a few years’ experience than his idiot mates. So please stop jumping to conclusions.

I am not going to argue with the timeline, I don’t doubt its broad accuracy, but it is partial in what it covers. Here is my take on the day.

An officially declared kettle at 3.45pm and police attempting to block and contain protesters are very similar things, the difference being just the name. In fact as your quote said, people were trying to escape ‘possible kettling’ at 1.10. At sometime before 2pm our section of the march was approaching the junction of Horse Guards and Great George St. There was no aggression or trouble and it was on the official route. This was out of sight of any trouble in Parliament Square and people seemed unaware of any events there. Police blocked the route just inside Great George St and appeared to be attempting to encircle (a kettle in effect if not designation) the march at that point. The crowd flooded backwards faster than they could encircle us and we spread out into St James’ Park (my mistake earlier, I said Green Park, they are right next to each other and I always thought it was just one park). To avoid further blocks we went round side roads into Parliament Square, so yes by that point we had been driven off the official route. Mounted police allowed us into Parliament Square and no trouble was apparent at the point where we entered. It turned out that this was after the barriers onto the Green had been broken down but police were still letting people into what you describe as being by this point an ‘illegal protest’.

The description of events in in the square seems reasonably accurate, there were large numbers of people milling around aimlessly, with nowhere to go, some were dancing to sound systems and a growing number were having a rumble with the Met. The nice mounted police that had let us in were by this time riding their horses backwards and forwards at an angry crowd who were pushing and shoving back, or vice versa, so I concentrated on checking exits and teaching the neph what to look out for, to stay aware of potential flashpoints and to always have somewhere to run to get out of the way. Other exits out of the square were held by police lines the whole time, well before any official kettle was declared. After an hour or two standing around the kettle was made official and being stuck became being officially stuck. Sometime after that I showed the neph that talking to a policeman one-on-one with a calm, polite middle class accent can be a very useful skill and we got out of the kettle onto Whitehall. After a cup of coffee at Trafalgar Square he wanted to see if anything was happening before we got our train. We went down Whitehall as far as the MOD building and could see flames and police in Parliament Square so stopped. Google maps puts us at least 280m from any trouble. There were tourists and passersby wandering about, as well as a few people leaving the demo, but no trouble. As we retreated a line of riot police appeared across Whitehall between us and Trafalgar Square and charged towards us wielding batons and shields and driving everyone back towards the riot, which seemed bizarre. Instead of running in the direction they were driving people we moved sideways fast which got us over a fence, a wall and down a side street without being assaulted or forced back into the kettle.

So does that agree with your internet facts and conclusions?

Oh, by the way, one last thing. Another internet fact. No MPs in kettles you say? How about this one, kettled on the same day that Ian Tomlinson was assaulted by a police officer and died.